Merry Christmas everyone

Merry Christmas everyone!

I am sorry but I am not so PC that I am going to call it “happy holidays”, or the even more unsexy “Season Greetings”…

“Season Greeting”!? WTF.

No I not am sorry to the guy whom I offended on the street by saying “Merry Christmas” to him, when I (or he) bumped into me and then felt offended that I said these unholy words – he then felt the need to yell back at me just to tell me that I should not force-feed my Christmas down his throat.

Someone got charcoal for Christmas I guess.

Anyway… a minor drama on my side as well, because two weeks ago I found out that the folder with all my half baked blog posts were gone, DELETED!! Missing. Major drama, and I panicked by looking everywhere for it, but it were gone to the eternal trashcan in cyber heaven.

Speaking about drama.

S…. finally got to me by insulting my breasts, and I immediately ended up feeling less confident about my body and began to overanalyze internally what she meant.

About two months ago I Googled “Spain”, “what can a lesbian do for fun in Barcelona” after I have been twitter stalking a German who is living there, and instead of asking her directly about what is so interesting about living in that place, then I asked the Google oracle instead. Much better than if this so-called cyber stalker were to ask someone that she didn’t know, about why they moved from Germany to Spain and what besides the weather and food could be so interesting about it – yes my homofomo were working overtime.

Just imagine if I missed out on something very interesting!! How would I be able to live with it??

Unfortunately Google decided to throw a tantrum and said to itself “nah, not gonna happen today.” and gave me completely unrelated links to what I wanted and needed to see. Instead I found a link to a video about a lesbian wedding proposal done on the Camino and forgot all about what in the world might happen in Barcelona. (If Google is confused about what I search for, then it will either suggest lesbian wedding videos, or cat videos to me)

You should read their blog and see the video too. (just listen to these adorable (and sexy) accents!)

WARNING! You will lose a few hours of your life by clicking on the link to the blog or video that will make you want to walk the Camino with your miss perfect.

Once again I got lured to spend several hours reading about that Camino de santiago walk.

Me and S… had previously been planning to do the Camino together, but we (I) ended up backing out from it because – bedbugs!! – and well.. who is crazy enough to walk 800++ km in 30 days?? I had lots of reasons not to do it, and I guess just as many reasons to go on the Camino and make out with S…. along the way.

Or something like that.

When we talked about the Camino walk, we usually ended up discussing about where to stay and especially about what to pack to great lengths and how much we should bring with us besides the essentials (iPad, iPhone, and pads). S… found this packing list that put both of our own lists to shame, when it came to reducing weight, as (I can’t remember her name now) had made it an art to plan her packing down to single grams for the Camino walk.

Anyone who include and measure 6 gram condoms and a 2 gram SD Card in their packing list, then they deserve to be named the uncontested winner of the most detailed (and maybe slightly anal) packing list ever.

I have to say, that when I am out on assignments, then my camera gear alone would end up being heavier than this packing list. But of course the list is also very specialized for a crazy long trekking adventure.

But when we were talking about the items on the list and what each of us would change, then I made an offhand remark that I especially liked that the original author of the list included Anita sports bras in her packing list as I would probably have been choosing the same for a trip like that.

S…’s immediately reply were that if anything, then I could just skip them and just travel without because I could then save 116 grams of weight, and she believed that it wouldn’t be essential for me to use sports bras for a walk like that (and that she by the way wouldn’t mind seeing me walk in just a t-shirt).

It would probably also make me very popular and reminded her about that we wouldn’t be all alone.

In the back of my mind I were *hm* “what in the world did she mean by that? I am not exactly running around with two mosquito bites!” Was that a hint that she didn’t like my breasts and that she thought that I were too small on top??? Arrgh drama!

I am actually quite happy with the size of my breasts and have very few complaints about my body in general (you know, besides the usual), but have once in a while thought about how would it be with something, you know, slightly larger, up there and if I should get myself “fixed” up. Not that I would ever do something about it, but you know.. sometimes these thoughts “would I be a happier person with larger breasts” do come up in my mind.

Happier? Nah I guess not. More popular with the ladies? Absolutely!

In the last years I have gone through some weight losses and somehow gains, that not always immediately settled in the chest area when I gained weight again, so by myself I have felt slightly insecure about my body image and how I generally looked.

At the same time, there are maybe 5-6 people that really can get to me and that I would listen to when it came to my self-image and body, and S…. are one of them, especially when I were completely unprepared for a comment like that. S… is a person who normally NEVER say anything about anyone’s bodies so when she said it, then I took it very personal and I ended up reflecting too much about what she said as if it had come from almost anyone else then I would have told them to go stick it.

After a few weeks with self doubt and nights where my confidence just got lower and lower, then I finally pulled myself together and confronted S… about her comment.

She reacted with complete surprise and shock from her side and wondered why I took it that personal, as she felt that I hardly ever took anything personal.




Women and their ink

I just have to say it.

I find inked women damn sexy, I mean, not the ones with tramp stamps and porn tattoos all over, but inks with thoughts and meaning, no matter if it only gives meaning to themselves, that is sexy I think.

Maybe it is because I don’t have any yet – oh I want one, two and maybe a few more, and I know what they should be, I know where they should be and yes, my Pinterest account is also full of tattoo inspirations. But right now I still have to make it further than to the door of the tattoo shop.

And not to run away when they look at me from the inside of the store would help too.

Yes I like to act tough, but I am a chicken inside when it comes to pain. Or more, it’s the idea or thought of pain in the near future that get me to chicken out.

And you know who… even got a few before I did. hmm. grrrr

So this leads me to my most recent shopping experience at the nearby minimart / supermarket

There was a lesbian. Yes, that was of course highly speculative, because she was alone. She was not busy groping or French kissing anyone up against the freezer when I met her. She didn’t have a sticker on her jacket, explaining that she was into girls.

But she got:

  • Cap
  • Crew Cut
  • Piercings
  • Practical jacket (!)
  • Mason Pants, including a ruler and a spirit(bubble) level in one of countless pockets on her thigh
  • Sway
  • That “look” in her eyes
  • and Tattoo’s

Check, Check, Check and Check.

Maybe she was just a house squatter, on her way to occupy another building? If you are from Singapore, and since you are reading this blog, then the chance is that it is highly likely, that you are. Then a squatter is a person – usually more than one person, who occupy a building that have been abandoned and empty for a longer period of time, to live in. Not really legal to so, but as long as the building owner does not freak out, then the police usually leave them alone – and they arrange some awesome parties once in a while.

Well, back to my story.

Anyways, It all worked well together: cap, check. Mason Pants, check. Spirit level, check. And I am always very curious when lesbians look, well “lesbians”. Yesterday I mentioned this to a lesbian friend, who equally got that lesbian look (think Caucasian version of Pat Law) and she said, “Funny, I always get a little annoyed with these types.”. I am sure Freud could get a lot of excitement out of that.

So we got to talk – the squatter type, not my friend. And it turned out, that she was an actual live carpenter.

By the way that reminds me, how many female carpenters are there in Singapore? I don’t recall ever seen a female carpenter in Singapore – Ever! and that makes it a little bit more exciting to meet a real live female carpenter. Okay, I know that in Singapore there is a bias and social boxing between white collar and blue collar people, i.e. people who actually know how to do stuff with their hands… I mean professionally – not the hm other way. Okay, I am officially rambling now. But what I mean is that I don’t care about what people do with their life as long as they feel happy with them self and what they do.

But have you ever seen a female carpenter in Singapore? If you do, then please let me know, because then I would like to interview her.

Of course I with my high heels and meticulously long hair quickly had to wove into the sentence that “my crush in Singapore she …”. with strong emphasis on “SHE”. In other words, “I am just like you! I am also a lesbian! and I’m totally not judging you!” Complete foolish conversational response related to “I actually have friends who are Ang Moh (Caucasian)”.

Where she interrupted me by saying

“Take it easy, even with your heels and femme look, then there is no way that you are straight, the way that you checked me out before we got to talk”.

Shit. Busted.

But after a short chit chat – comparing if we had any common friends in the Team L Circle, we split and agreed to share a drink if we got to meet in Vive one day.

By the way. It is amazing how much you can get out of a person just by telling them that you like and/or find their tattoos sexy.

In a top-10 over meaningless blog posts, this one gets the nominated for the top spot.

Shaved, Trimmed or Jane with the jungle?

Cameron Diaz like Bush! That should have been the title of this blog. But I felt that would be too much and give me and the blog more attention than I needed.

Oh, that’s what she said!

But no, not that way, not like she finally changed team and joined the rainbow side. She in her recent book, advocate for us to grow a thick bushy jungle, you know down, there.

Now then.

It’s a good question and I will in no way make me wise on “what women prefer,” because I believe that we are quite divided on the matter.

But! Personally, I’m not into shaved pussies / cunts / va-jay-jays at all. With a little double standard from myself, because I have for years done the trip to get myself waxed every 3rd week. But no more! I’m tired of it and have been for quite a while now.

I think it’s become pretty unsexy,  actually, when an adult female somewhat resembles a too young teen between the legs . But there are certainly differences of opinions and I’ve been with women who preferred the style both on themselves and on their lovers. Well, they can pack up when it comes to me now.

Actually, I really like looking at the “jungle”, as you call it. No, not an completely untrimmed jungle that have never been touched for the last 20 years. I prefer something that have been well trimmed or kept. You take care of the hair on top of your own head right? So maybe it is time to look further down and do something there too?

And mostly because it’s a bit annoying to get hair in your mouth.

So a trimmed triangle – like relatively short hair where there should be room for my tongue . That must be the answer. But I speak definitely only for myself. However, I have the impression that most of my girlfriends – lesbians as well as straight women – like roughly the same haircut. A controlled naturalness, so to speak.

It’s been a widely active discussion between friends and even female co-workers through the time and I guess this is something that we can actively discuss without hating each other or join the trenches in the sisterhoods drama’s – right?


Sex Ed in School?

Being a child of two countries, I can’t help comparing them with each other – and today it comes to the most important part of education. SEX ED is on the top of the list when it comes to mind.

Sexuality education is implemented in many secondary schools in the Netherlands, there is not an legal framework that requires it and this is why some, particularly faith-based, schools can refuse to implement sex education. Elsewhere, programmes are mostly comprehensive, often evidence-based and regularly updated.

Dutch sex education emerges from an understanding that young people are curious about sexuality and that they need, want and have a right to accurate and comprehensive information about sexual health and is takes rather serious by school management and teachers. Materials are characterized by clear, direct, age-appropriate language in attractive designs. The leading message is: If you are going to have sex, do it safely (and make sure it is fun). The leading philosophy is: Young people have the right to adequate sex education so that they can make well-informed choices in sexuality and relationships.

But in Singapore there are NO sexual education and any talk about sex before marriage is shunned about. I recall that I had one teacher who tried to talk about it and was let go a few days after because a few parents became outraged about the idea that their teenage girls would even think about sex before they turned at least 25 or was about to get married.

I firmly believe that Singapore would benefit from having an active talk about sex in primary schools, just like Netherlands does. It can only help teenagers in the end.

Next step would be to get schools in both Singapore and Netherlands to include homosexuality in the curriculum as well, while they kept it at a neutral stance. Singapore still have a rather negative view on homosexuality and the idea that two of the same gender can love each other fully is even today a rather shocking notion.

But I am looking forward to the day where sex ed teachers can walk into a classroom and say the following words. “Sex is something you do with someone of your own or the opposite sex”

Something else that could be nice (yes I am dreaming now) were if students were given a book related to sex education, that only included photos of thousands of different pussies / cunts / va-jay-jays. In that way they could see (as one learns when one has performed oral sex on another woman), that the labia may be small, large, tight or less tight. That a clitoris vary from pin to marble in size (and even in some cases may swell from one end of the size spectrum to the other if one does its job well). It could lead to the end of insecurity, and that women of all sexual interests started to actually accept and like their own bodies for what they are.

Wouldn’t it be wonderful?

No more questions for “Dr. Sexy”:

“Dear Dr. Sexy, I am a girl of 16 years. My labia hanging out of the crack, is this normal or am I sick? Regards the confused Capricorn.”

Wow, huh?