The Internet zombie horde is here

Wow that was interesting.

Yesterdays overwhelming reaction to the post were quite a surprise and I ended up stressing my brother and his wife about it (and me too by the way).

Not that he didn’t agree with what I wrote in the post, but more the idea that his daughter, my niece, could end up as the primary focus of an hungry internet zombie horde that demanded to know all the ugly details.


More brainz pls!


I am not going to disclose the name of the school or the teacher. The schools management did side with the teacher and my niece had to accept her first (and hopefully only) detention. It is completely unfair of the school but I am not going to throw a young child out in front of a selfie needing crowd, where she will only end up in the center of two sides where they for all the wrong reasons focus on her, what she wrote and then afterward anally dissect if she wrote anything right or wrong out from an somehow adult perspective that got no interest in her wellbeing or person.

On forums and on Facebook this has been discussed at length where it were also concluded by, I guess straight people who don’t have any contact to the gay community at all, that “LGBT’s are known to sensationalize issues”, that I should post my IC, my full name, home address, employers name, my age, document the names of my niece and brother for verification, as well as give up the name of the school and teacher for documentation.

But if you are demanding all that, then you missed the point of the blog. I wrote about it to highlight the differences of what my nieces of the same age are going through. How different educational systems see personal essays (teachers are part of that system)  and give you something to think and reflect about. That is all. I mean maybe the educational system in Singapore is not so good or perfect after all.

It is not that important to name the teacher or the school. Are they idiots? Sure they are. But I would still feel bad about naming them even if they are part of an educational system that I feel are fundamentally wrong.

I got some overwhelming interesting and positive comments to the post, and I can fully accept that there are guys, men, like Tony who feel that we are a threat to his masculinity.

We really aren’t.

I got a nice email from an UK politician and I got an offer to send my niece to a liberal pro LGBT school in California (for a “tiny” amount of money of course).

The family are doing fine and do well on their own, but thanks for all comments and support.

Yes it is fine that not everyone agrees with me too and I can take the criticism, and dear Tony I will always be available to take an honest face to face argument on why there should be room for “someone” with a sexuality like mine and that “we” are no danger to anyone at all. Not you especially.

I don’t have an issue with people who don’t understand our need to be accepted, I get that it makes some feel uneasy when we are open about our sexuality, when we dare to show affection in public, or that some just don’t know what to do or behave when they are near an openly gay person (Beware! You will get a hug and we will infect you if you get too near), because new things and thoughts are just so darn scary to humanity.

My niece got an right to be anonymous for a little while longer, she got a right to just be the child she is and live a life where she or her parents don’t have to deal with someone who jump in front of them to take a selfie, immortalize them on instagram, or demand intimate details of their life’s.

Thank you for all the fish.


Now Internet. Just relax. There will be a new topic for you tomorrow to throw yourself at.



The difference between a gold star and detention

(There is an update to this post, that I feel that you should read after you have read this post.)

I got nieces (and nephews) in both Singapore and Netherlands(That’s Holland to some of you), as some of you who have followed my blog will know that my sister is living in Amsterdam, and my brother is still living in Singapore. They both got some amazing and wonderful children that I can’t help to adore – like they adore me. I mean what is there not to love about an aunt who constantly bribe with cupcakes, hugs and even got the patience to play console games with them?

One of my nieces in Amsterdam, wrote an essay about me and why I am the best Aunt someone ever could have, and that I by the way liked women (other girls to her), just like her teacher did and that she wished that I could live with them in Amsterdam because “mom is not as strict when she is visiting”.

She is the same who loudly told her class mates that she hope that I could marry her teacher, because “it would be so beautiful with two brides”. Yes I guess that in her optics, that if one dressed up bride is good, then two brides at a wedding would be more than twice as good.

Two brides is equal to two wedding cakes right? right??

That also lead to some awkward laughs between me and her teacher. I mean, it is on the same level as when your straight friends invite you to a dinner, and then desperately look for another lesbian for the dinner, to even the same-sex level, and then try to set the two of you up, because they only know the two of you.


Anyway, she in her essay described, from her view, my issues with some of my Singaporean family members, the divide it made, and that she hoped that everyone just could be good friends because she felt that it was unfair just because I liked “girls” and not “boys”.

Her essay gave her a gold star and an A.

My niece, my brothers daughter, in Singapore heard about that when they Skyped each other (or facetimed).

She is one of the shy and quiet ones who is often content with playing and reading by herself, but these two got some kind of magic connection that brings her out of her shell when they are together or skyping each other, and turns into one big blabber mouth when they are able to hang out. So when she heard that an essay about me got my niece in Netherlands a gold star, then the devil got into her because she absolutely did not want to be left behind in that game.

Yes, when I am on a group call with them on Skype, I always use clever tactics and don’t answer questions on who I like the most and so ;-) Super skill #129 you get when you have more than one niece or nephew who tend to ask leading questions.

“Describe a family member who inspire you”.
Was the topic for the essay.

My niece immediately jumped onto it and wrote about me, with inspiration from my niece’s essay in Netherlands.

She got an “F”, Fail, written with big red letters and a comment “Gays cannot be an inspiration in Singapore society!!”

That sweet little quiet girl, who hardly open her mouth unless she is spoken to, got crushed. But incredible enough, she also got pissed about her F and demanded an explanation in the class. Her teacher flatly told her to keep quiet and shut up, she refused and wanted to know why she got an F and I think for the first time in her life stood up to herself.

“You know why” was the only answer. She refused to budge, the teacher refused to give in, and so she ended up in detention for an essay that in Netherlands gave an A.

Brian, my brother were full of wonder. What in the world could have happen since they called him to the school. And then about her?

He rushed to the school worried that something have happened, only to be met with a little girl who couldn’t stop crying.

So what gives you an A in one country can sometimes give you an F in others. Something to think about, and wonder what that really means for the Singaporean society and the way we value the people who live in it.


(There is an update to this post, that I feel that you should read as well)