You really need to read this blog post by the Chiongs

The Chiongs, whom I am a big fan of, continue to write some of the most amazing posts that have ever come out of Singapore. Their blog is, if anyone were to ask me, one the most important voices in South Asia at the moment.

So what makes the Chiongs so special to me? Well, the only they – or rather Liv/Olivia write about is their Singaporean twosome life as a same-sex couple with a young daughter. This might sound boring and awful common to some, what it really should be, but this is Singapore and living in a same-sex married relationship with a child is not an every-day relationship. To many Singaporeans that is just not common at all, and is something that too many Singaporeans have some very wild ideas about what really is.

The (unfortunate) reality is that a same-sex relationship have just the same issues as the more conventional relationships. You know the relationships where there are one of each gender in. The Chiongs blog is a perfect example that they, we, are just as normally boring when it comes to it. We work, we sleep, we watch Netflix in bed – and yes once in a while we have sex too, and through IVF (or magic beans and comfortable Birkenstocks) we have children together too.

The Chiongs through their blog is just so perfect in educating the average Singaporean about what is means to be a same-sex couple and that there really is nothing to fear from someone like us (no really, it’s true. Nothing to be scared about at all) and I hope that other couples would come out and tell their stories as well because we need every voice to speak up -or something like this will happen.

Liv wrote back in October about an issue that they have to go through in doing something as what should be one of the most simple things in life for a couple with a child. That is to find a kindergarten. But where they then are met with questions if that is even legal for them, and that the kindergarten first needed to check with MOE (Ministry of Education) in Singapore before they could let them know if it were legal for them to accept a child of a same sex couple into the kindergarten.

. . . .

You should read their blog post here as it is a very interesting read, and it makes me wonder why I am so eager in getting pregnant myself, and why I still have the idea and somehow expect that my children should have the opportunity to grow up in Singapore – or at least make sure that they spend some years there.

I mean is Singapore really a viable option for same-sex couples who want children and a normal life?

 

 

 

Is it morally okay that gay haters in Singapore attack children of same-sex couples?

We are now a few days away from Pink Dot and I am seriously pissed!

As I mentioned before we have in Singapore a small but very hateful group who feel entitled and righteous to attack everyone and anyone that does not conform to their own narrow minded world view. That is anyone who is living within the LGBTQA sphere in or around Singapore.

And now they found a new victim to attack.

Or said in another way.

They just realized that lesbian couples can have children together. Initially they were baffled by that idea. How did that compute? Huh? Two women with a child?? They – were – stunned! Wa! In Singapore!!?

I guess that things like IVF and other means of artificial insemination are mostly unknown to them.

I am not saying that that group is the sum of the Singaporean intellectual elite, actually they are most likely very far from it.

The group recently hit a new low point when they decided to attack a little girl and her two (wonderful) parents, because they not only dared to be so brave that they are living in Singapore as an all too normal family, with the small exception that they are a lesbian couple, with everyday boring issues. But then the couple even dared to blog about it in a way, so even a blind person could see that same-sex couples with children is just as doable as heterosexual couples with children.

In fact they even manage to show that their child is happy and very functioning in a family like theirs, and that even same-sex couples have troubles with getting their children to eat vegetables.

Somewhere else in Singapore, peoples faces exploded by the news.

“Gaaah! How can it be that a nuclear lesbian or a gay family can be this happy! That is just so sick!!”

Dear Vernon Chen, Siti Scarlett Zubaidah, Peter Shee, Zaid Lazim, Shamsuria Nor, Siti Scarlett Zuibaidah, Gina Ngiam, Hashim Yuof, Adeline Ho, Mary Tian (who believe homosexuality is like child pornography), Evan Lee and Nina Hong; Do you really believe that growing up with two mothers is a danger to a childs growth and future adult life?

Well, The kids are just fine, thank you very much. Actually, they’re much better than your kids.

According to studies done in the past years, then children of lesbian parents are actually more accepting to democratic attitudes about society than their peers from heterosexual households, are more well rounded and is better able to handle conflicts compared to children who grow up in heterosexual nuclear families according to several studies.

Yes, yes I know. Having a “democratic” attitude in Singapore, might be an issue….

Read the studies “Children Reared By Female Couples Score Higher on Good Citizenship Than Children Reared by Heterosexual Parents“, “The Australian study of child health in same-sex families: background research, design and methodology ” and “The National Lesbian Family Study: 4. Interviews With the 10-Year-Old Children” for more information about these studies. They are quite interesting reads.

Abbie Goldberg from Clark University in Massachusetts who researches homosexual parenting, told LiveScience in 2013 that gay parents “tend to be more motivated and more committed than heterosexual parents on average, because they chose to be parents.” Accidental pregnancies rarely happen in homosexual couples compared to almost 50% of the time for heterosexual couples. Simply choosing to be parents makes a significant difference in whether you will take your parenting responsibilities seriously or not.

Stephen Scott head of research at the National Academy for Parenting Practitioners in United Kingdom, said in 2013 that gay women are better at raising children than traditional parents.

He justified his maybe slight controversial view that research shows that children of two mothers are more ambitious and fight more for social justice than children brought up by a mother and a father.

Daughters of lesbian parents are more likely to look at subjects that traditionally have been considered masculine, for example: Engineering, Medicine and Legal subjects. And that children of lesbians and gays are not becoming “more” gay or seek out gay relationships more often than children of heterosexual parents.

So just because we want to have children on our own, then that does not mean that we will populate and take over the world with our homosexuality.

Well,….okay…. not yet at least.

That anyone, ANYONE, say that same-sex couples are not fit to be parents, simply just don’t have their facts straight – so to speak, hm, and need to look closer into the subject of what it take for same sex couples to become parents and the efforts that we will have to go through, as we most often are not given the same financial benefits as heterosexual couples get.

As gay parents, there WILL be questions that they (we) will have to take with the children that heterosexual parents don’t have to take. But as an adaptable spieces, then we are able to get over the strangest things and still come out on top on it. Besides, someone else have already gone through it before and either written a book about it as a self-help book, or written an easy step by step guide too. So there are really nothing to be concerned or pissed about when it comes to children of gay parents.